Over 350 million people use dating apps worldwide. That number alone explains the exhaustion. Swipe fatigue is real, and so is the paradox of choice that comes with too many options and too few meaningful connections. According to a 2024 Forbes Health study, 78% of dating app users feel emotionally, mentally, or physically exhausted by them. The most common reason? An inability to find a good connection with someone else, reported by 40% of respondents.
The problem is not a shortage of people. The problem is finding the right one among an overwhelming crowd.
What Exhaustion Looks Like
Gen Z reports the highest levels of burnout. The Forbes Health survey found that 79% of Gen Z users feel drained by dating apps. Boston University researchers have noted growing disenchantment among singles who expected these platforms to simplify their search. Instead, the process often feels like a second job.
An SSRS poll conducted in January 2024 found that 37% of U.S. adults have used a dating site or app at some point. Among those users, 41% described their time on the platforms as positive. Another 32% said it was negative. The remaining 27% felt nothing at all, which may be the most telling response.
Dating apps generated $6.18 billion in revenue in 2024, according to Business of Apps. That money comes from people paying for premium features, better visibility, and algorithmic boosts. Approximately 25 million users pay for these upgrades. The industry thrives on hope and frustration in equal measure.
Relationships Beyond the Algorithm
Dating apps serve one function. They introduce people who might otherwise never cross paths. They do not, however, define what kind of relationship someone should pursue. Some users search for long-term commitment. Others prefer arrangements that fall outside conventional expectations. A person might find a sugar daddy, seek a casual connection, or date with marriage in mind. The point is that the format of meeting someone does not limit the nature of what follows.
Clarity about the relationship type matters more than the method of introduction. Bumble reports that 64% of women respondents refuse to settle for less than what they want. This applies regardless of the relationship structure someone seeks.
Knowing What You Want
The phrase “don’t settle” sounds simple. Executing it requires honesty about what you want. According to Bumble’s 2025 Dating Trends report, which polled 41,294 members, 72% of users globally focus on finding long-term partners within the next year. Pew Research Center data shows that 44% of app users cite meeting a long-term partner as a major reason for using dating apps. Another 40% say casual dating is their primary goal. Both are valid. Neither works if you pretend to want one while actually wanting the other.
Hinge’s research found that 90% of Gen Z users on the platform want to find love. Yet over half, 56%, say fear of rejection has stopped them from pursuing a potential relationship. Hesitation, gendered expectations, and a lack of meaningful conversation on dates hold people back. Knowing what you want is the first step. Acting on it is the harder part.
Slow Dating as a Strategy
Relationship coach Jonathan Hartley describes slow dating as being more considerate about how often you go on dates and taking time to build emotional connection without pressure. Bumble’s data shows that 31% of members now date this way intentionally. They set no specific end goal and ignore traditional milestones.
Therapist Mere Abrams calls this approach a “slowmance.” Hinge’s 2024 report found that queer daters in particular embrace this model, prioritizing emotional intimacy and trust over speed. The goal is not to accumulate matches or hold multiple conversations at once. Hinge recommends pausing, reflecting, and making intentional changes to how you approach the process.
This runs counter to the app design itself. Platforms reward engagement. They want users swiping, matching, messaging. The business model depends on it. Slow dating means using the tool without letting it dictate your pace.
External Pressures Shape Dating Choices
Bumble’s research reveals that 95% of singles surveyed say concerns about the future affect who and how they date. Finances, job security, housing, and climate change all factor in. People bring their anxieties to dating because those anxieties shape their lives. A partner’s stability matters when your own feels uncertain.
Age filters are loosening. Bumble reports that 63% of surveyed users say age is not a defining factor when dating. People are expanding their criteria in some areas while tightening them in others. The willingness to broaden acceptable age ranges while maintaining strict preferences elsewhere suggests a pragmatic approach to compatibility.
The Case for Optimism
Marriages that start online tend to last. A seven-year University of Chicago study found that relationships formed online were more likely to endure than those formed offline. About 6% of people who met online reported marriage breakups, compared to 7.6% of people who met in person. The difference is small but consistent.
The Knot surveyed nearly 17,000 couples who married in 2024 or planned weddings for 2025. About 27% said their relationship began on a dating site or app. A 2024 SSRS poll found that 61% of adults believe relationships that begin online are as successful as those that begin in person.
These numbers matter because they counter the narrative that app-based relationships are inherently shallow or doomed. Meeting online says nothing about the quality of what follows.
AI and the Future of Matching
A survey by Match and the Kinsey Institute found that 26% of U.S. singles use AI to enhance their dating lives. That figure represents a 333% increase from the prior year. Hinge CEO Justin McLeod has outlined plans for smarter matchmaking, personalized algorithms, and dating coaching powered by AI. Bumble already uses AI to blur explicit images and detect fake profiles.
These tools address some sources of frustration. Better matching could reduce time wasted on incompatible people. Safety features could lower the risk of harmful encounters. The technology is imperfect but improving.
What Settling Looks Like
Settling happens when you accept less than you want because you fear the alternative. It happens when exhaustion wins. It happens when you confuse any connection with the right connection.
Bumble reports that over 85% of users seek an empowered and lasting connection, not a hookup. Hinge data shows that 58% of users who assess their own dating habits feel optimistic about their future relationships. Confidence comes from clarity, from knowing what you want and refusing to pretend otherwise.
The saturated market is not the obstacle. The obstacle is losing sight of what you came for.
