Posted on: July 9, 2019 Posted by: Carly Klein Comments: 0

There’s a popular saying that life makes more sense when we start to learn how to love ourselves. Believe us when we say there has never been a truer word spoken!

The main factor that holds people back from succeeding in life and ‘going for it’ is nothing else but themselves. Yes, that’s right: 90% of what is currently holding you back from having the most fulfilled life tends to be your own self-perception.

From excessive overthinking, comparing to others and beating ourselves up, it’s easy to let fear get in the way of our potential.

If this all sounds too familiar, here’s a list of helpful tips and advice to help prevent you from holding yourself back, and to start going for it more:

Focus on the journey, not the destination

We’re constantly taught by society to be setting goals and working to milestones. This isn’t a negative, but it mentally teaches us that if we don’t meet that huge milestone, happiness may not be found.  

By focusing too much on the final goal, we can be distracted from our journeys to success, which can steal happiness from us. Therefore, try to concentrate your attention on the daily actions and practices you need to complete. Try to live in the moment more, enjoying the journey it takes to reach a goal instead of stressing about the end achievement.

Remove the words ‘should’ and ‘could’

There are two main connotations to the words “should” and “could” – both are attached to doubt, expectation, regret, and procrastination. When we talk about the things we should or could do, it’s almost as if we are feeling like there are too many obstacles which could prevent it.

In some cases, maybe there are. But no negatives come out of being more positive and assertive. Change the words into ‘I will’. By thinking this and saying it out loud, you mentally prepare yourself to have more confidence in yourself.

Address any areas you need help with

Sometimes, situations and experiences may have a detrimental effect on the way our minds work daily. It can be hard to get past a tough experience, or perhaps you have been struggling with your self-love or self-worth for a long period of time.

If this is the case, sometimes professional help is needed. It’s too easy to trap ourselves into vicious circles of doubt, thus sinking to the bottom and giving up on climbing back out. This is where counselling and therapy sessions can help tremendously. There are some brilliant practices that professionals are aware of that are the key to starting to love ourselves again.

If this is an area you feel will work for you, search the Counselling Directory here to find a counsellor in your area.

Practice being grateful every day

Everyone goes about gratitude in different ways, which is totally fine as there is no right or wrong way to be grateful.

When you go to bed at night, try reflecting on three things you have been grateful for. They can literally be as tiny or as big as you like. For example, enjoying your favorite coffee at your local coffee shop with a colleague you get on well with. This tends to shed away those depression feelings before going to sleep.

When you wake up in the morning, ask yourself what three things you can be grateful for, so that you start the day off with a happy mindset. If your day has been a disappointment, ask yourself what could have made it better. It’s important to keep reflecting, and never lose sight of being grateful.

Remember that above all, it’s rare that we give ourselves the credit we deserve in life. We may not have developed this magical life, so instead, we compare ourselves and beat ourselves up.

Try to take some time out to give credit where due. Life is short, and there are opportunities out there that need grabbing by the horns! And guess what? You’re completely good enough!

Leave a Comment